Sunday, January 11, 2009

The Urgency of Now

Sometimes it feels as if everything is spiraling uncontrollably into some unknown point where the outcome is blurred. Other times everything feels like it's under control.

This is not one of those times.

On Wednesday of last week, through circumstances out of my control, I was "forced" to lose my job. Now this job wasn't anywhere close to being my ideal job, yet it did pay the bills and I had made considerable sacrifices in order to get it. See to be close to this job I had been living in my Aunt's living room for the past four months. My life consisted of going to work, sleeping at my Aunt's and then doing it all again the next day. It was worth it.

Regardless of the fact that the job was demeaning on so many levels, and that it killed any sliver of social life that I had left,it paid somewhat decent and it was allowing me to help my parents financially, as well as to save some money.

On Wednesday things got complicated, lies were formulated, a job was lost and I had to once again find myself questioning the path that my life has been taking.

In reality my unstable lifestyle began when my family moved to another town in order to afford a house. I stayed behind to finish high school. Eventually I ended up moving in with my family for about two years, only to once again relocate to the big city (no, not NYc unfortunately) because of my stubbornness to get a college degree.

It just so happens that the city where my school was is one of the most expensive places to live in the nation, so for the past five years I've been living out of a suitcase. Crashing from place to place, in friend's couches, renting spare rooms, a small stint where I had my own apartment (which cost way too much), and the occasional nights spent in my car.

This was all done with the end goal of getting a degree and becoming "somebody". I refused to succumb to the "comfortable" stereotype that is provided for those with my status. You know, the lazy illegal, who barely made it through high school.

But a few months back, with the degree in hand and no job prospect in sight, I took the aforementioned job. And now it's gone.

I find myself in a strange point in life. Mid-twenties, back at my parent's place and no job.

Granted I'm not gonna just sit here and wait for one; I'm going bust my ass to find whatever work I can. But as Cantinflas (a famous Mexican philosopher) once famously said, "Ahi esta el detalle" (there lies the detail)

Here I am unemployed, with a degree in a field that is in huge demand in this country, and I'm going to be applying at fast food joints for work...

This is where Dr. King's words come into play:

"We are now faced with the fact that tomorrow is today. We are confronted with the fierce urgency of now. In this unfolding conundrum of life and history, there 'is' such a thing as being too late. This is no time for apathy or complacency. This is a time for vigorous and positive action" - Dr Martin Luther King Jr

I'm faced with that urgency of now. If tomorrow is indeed today, then I need to do everything in my power to help pass the DREAM Act, because it's getting close to being too late.


  1. i am so mad for you, and so impressed with your ability to channel your frustrations into positive energy. you have achieved so much already, and you will ultimately succeed, no matter how many obstacles stand in your way.
    long live cantinflas... :)

  2. Moving back in with parents is indeed difficult.I feel that at this point I should be helping them out and not the other way around, but what can you do? We are trying our best.

    I am glad that you are using your current situation as motivation right away.
    When similar things happen to me I tend to do the opposite first and then after a while I use it as motivation, which is an emotionally exhausting process.

    I sent you a message on DAP, my email address is on my blogger profile if you need to vent some more or just exchange ideas.